The waves of friendship

Screenshot_2016-02-23-10-50-50-1I am one of those who didn’t have much luck in friendship growing up, always falling upon the wrong people and searching in all the wrong places for a warm place to belong. I naturally ended up spending a lot of time alone, running away from the masses that just didn’t look like me or feel as I did. I regret nothing, this should be said.

Society does everything to make you feel like the problem lies within you, that you just aren’t worthy of the right people or even worse, that they don’t exist and you are forever doomed to walk this world alone, only finding company in cold conciliatory mirrors. Thing is, it’s all a question of random luck, not good or bad like everyone wants to paint it, just misplaced luck that one day makes a loud comeback and puts things perfectly in order.

We are the products of timing, the sufferers of providence, some given the chance to start pleasantly, surrounded by those they deem similar to them, and others enduring a longer journey that ultimately builds and prepares them for beautiful surprises, as they’re finally allowed to fit their supposedly unfit personas in the adequate pond. Because we’re all worthy, we all deserve people we can call home, people we can turn into family, we simply don’t all get to have it at the same time, and that’s OK. It’s not about popularity or likeability, don’t believe the rumors and what appears to be; you may have hundreds of fans and still feel alone, hear a thousand I love you’s yet feel empty and unfulfilled. It’s a question of clicking with other human beings, finding a twin spark in the eyes of another, that rare understanding which makes true friendship the holy grail of beautiful relationships. Good news is, there’s at least one for each of us, sometimes more, hiding unwillingly from our sight, awaiting pure hazard to do its thing and pull us together.

So hang on tirelessly, hope incessantly, believe firmly in the inevitability of happiness and constantly endeavour to make yourself a better person even if you have to take all the hard steps alone; you’ll only end up stronger and more worthy of those fireworks. In the end, the most important thing to remember is that it’s not your fault, it’s not you, it’s the places and the time that are to blame, do not doubt your self-worth and don’t diminish your self-esteem; we each have a different adventure to embark on and a different landing space. All we have to do is buckle up and tighten our grip, for that exhilarating wave is coming and we’re ALL allowed to ride it.

Self-worth & privacy

Older people often make fun or criticize our generation for being so comfortable publishing and exposing their lives on platforms like Facebook, Twitter and Instagram, but they don’t really delve deeper into the matter, questioning why people are acting the way they do nowadays.

If you think of it, there are more people now on Earth than there has ever been, the media controls all our thoughts from what we have for breakfast to who we love, to how we tie our shoelaces, and thanks to the Internet, anyone can become famous, anyone can showcase what makes them, according to society’s modern standards, superior to the rest in one way or another.

Then, in an accidentally ironic twist, they tell the young ones “be unique, shine”. Beautiful. They expect these kids to magically sparkle amongst millions constantly flashing their own uniqueness thanks to the omnipresent force of the media, rendering it impossible to express those little things that make them truly different and special. Today, everyone’s striving to push through the masses, in need of some sort of recognition, and what feels more “unique” than our extraordinarily ordinary daily lives?

Those young ones everyone finds easy to mock, were born in an era that doesn’t care, that doesn’t market talent only but potential revenue. You will never be BeyoncĂ© if you’re born in some Ethiopian suburb, you will never be Gisele if you don’t nude up, you will never be someone as long as you’re you, because no matter how good you are at something, there’s someone out there marketing their average potential better than you.

So they will keep publicizing what the world won’t see, they will keep smiling at cameras that would rather capture someone else’s beauty, and they will keep looking for validation where they know they can shine, even for just the shortest while. Hey, I’m here, can you see me?