So the title says it all, but it just doesn’t do justice to how clumsy I really can be. I’ve perfected the art in an array of situations, from walking into things to things walking into me – yes, it has gone that far.
Let’s take this morning for example, I prepared my oatmeal in my favorite Christmas mug, dash of cinnamon and all the works and I happily sat in my bed preparing myself for the day. Sounds lovely till now. However as I was getting seated, legs crossed like the yogi I’m not, I managed to burn my ankle. You read right, my ankle, of all places my body had made burn-ready. I had put the mug in the crevice left between my thighs and feet and scorching hot as it was, I rested my ankle on it.
My exploits have ranged from tripping on my own pants, left foot stepping on my right one, bumping into walls and open cupboards… It’s safe to say I’ve earned my deal of bruises over the years. I’ve missed door openings by a few inches, spilled my tea on my lap absent-mindedly thinking the glass had reached my lips, tomatoes exploding in my face and forks magically jumping out of my hand, I’ve even slipped on imaginary objects.
My head is always in the clouds, and I basically don’t calculate things as I tumble through life; I just manage to fray my way through the haze, stumbling over obstacles I sometimes create. This applies to every aspect of my life whether it’s the ceiling lamp I screwed on improperly causing a short circuit in the house’s electrical system or my next career step. I’d concur that it’s a strange way to live, often tripping over thin air and weird ideas, but I would be lying if I said it’s not immensely fun to experience. I’m a twenty-five year old child with the happy point of view of an infant, I’ll laugh at anything, first of all at my misacts. There’s nothing wrong with stumbling through the whirlwind of life, I’m clumsy in the oddest of ways, and I enjoy it fully, even if that costs me a few hundred bruises along the way.